Where do we go, my lovely?

Iron Maiden for Download 2013. It's the announcement everyone wanted to hear. It's not the most shocking or surprising revelation, as having the biggest heavy meal band in the world headlining one of the biggest rock festivals in the world is a bit of a no-brainer but fuck me it's exciting. It could only be better if the other two nights are headlined by Slipknot and Slipknot.


It does beggar the question though; what will Sonisphere do? The rumblings about Led Zeppelin continue, and I can see Green Day or Foo Fighters getting a slot but in terms of your true metal fans, Maiden is going to be a tough one to beat. Based on the redundancies and various board level departures that surrounded Sonisphere 2012 it's difficult to know if it will return to these shores.

I'm not going to evangelise about how astonishing The Irons are as I tend to do that on a regular basis. What I will say is that they are a genre defining band, and although they are not technically from my generation they remain as important, if not more so, than they ever have been to the heavy metal movement. 'Movement' might be a bit of a daft word but this kind of thing is something that I've been mulling over for a while. Allow me to embellish;

It seems that in today's rock/metal world, there is a lack of any truly new movements. As metal became less cool in the late 80s and early 90s and was replaced by grunge as the misfits choice of listening, bands such as Nirvana and Pearl Jam had music by the balls. Seattle came out of nowhere as a scene and our world became resplendent in long shorts and ill-fitting knitwear. Regardless of whether you liked it or not, the garage style of grunge completely changed the sound of music.

Then nu metal, without doubt the most divisive genre ever to emerge in our world, merged hip hop into massive riffs. The music was underpinned by lyrical themes about abuse, bullying, and it was angry listening that meant something to a generation. Nu metal died out (sorry Fred, but it really did) but the sentiment was reborn in the 2000s with Emo, which spawned a million bands who sounded and looked the same. Even if it's not your thing it's impossible to deny how much of an impact My Chemical Romance had.

But for me, it all gets a bit muddy after that. It doesn't feel like this very moment in time has anything unique happening in metal. There isn't any development. The UK hardcore scene is producing some great bands and US outfits like Between the Buried and Me continue to be innovative, but who is the next Faith No More? Who is the next Korn? Has there truly been a band since My Chemical Romance that has caused such a tectonic shift in musical evolution?

Metal has evolved so much in the last 50 years and there are certain names that will always be quoted as responsible for this but what happens next? There is so much amazing music coming out but is any of it going to change the future? Who knows.

Anyway, this is all a bit much for a Friday. I'm off to drive 2,000 miles in a 1986 Nissan dressed as a Ninja Turtle with my brother for charity.

Peace
M
\m/

Little drummer boy

I might have mentioned it once or twice before but I love a bit of drumming. My old man bought me a set when I was 14, partly due to the fact that I was a fucking annoyance and it kept me out of the way, but mainly because I was growing up in Norfolk and he was keen to distract me from the temptations of incest and sheep buggery.

My mate and I then spent the next four years ruining the relaxed ambiance of our village, me on the skins, him on the out of tune guitar, with our fucking horrendous covers of Nirvana, Green Day, 3 Colours Red, Feeder, and other timely outfits. Me and Bro Dude also formed Spazmodik Kontraction, a Scandinavian-inspired deathgrind band that covered songs by then-popular girl band Hepburn.

But lo, off I went to university and since then, I've not had space for the kit. Until now...

Me and Hot Chick now live in a place with a slightly Fritzl-esque soundproof basement so preparations are in place for Operation Drum Resurrection. All I need is a crash cymbal stand and a double kick and I'll be touring with Dream Theater before you know it.

The kind people at Metal Blade have been on an album release mission of late which has resulted in some absolute quality finding its way onto my Non-Apple MP4 player. There are two that have really caused penile engorgement on my part; A New Era Of Corruption from Whitechapel and Blekinge from Istapp.

Whitechapel's latest album came out a few weeks ago and it's quite simply devastating (in a good way). This mob are absolute genre leaders in deathcore and the new outing cements this. Enormous riffs, crippling vocals and big name appearances (Chino Moreno, anyone?). It's a truly wonderful thing.

Speaking of which, Istapp are a new band on me but Blekinge is without doubt in my top ten albums of the year so far. Swedish black/folk/death/prog metal? Don't mind if I do. I'd recommend wandering over to their MySpace for a bit of a listen, particularly to I Väntan På Den Absoluta Nollpunkten

Is it wrong that I'm looking at my clock, which is currently sitting at 07:35, and thinking about beers? I know I have a problem, that problem being I don't have enough money to drink as much as I'd like to. But the weekend shall undoubtedly be full of ale and merriment, punctuated by globules of extreme metal and arse-leakingly amusing stupidity so with all this in mind, I'll leave you lot to it.

High 5 mother fuckers

M
\m/

"Not a day goes by...

...when I don't spare you a thought"

The prophetic lyrics of one Frankie Stubbs, frontman of Sunderland punk legends Leatherface; one of, if not the most important band in my life.

"But MADman, why are you being such a dramatic fucklordassmonkey?" I hear you ask. Well it upon my knee, young child, and your weird uncle will tell you a story...

On my eleventh birthday, my primary school embarked on it's annual coach trip to the Isle of Wight (stick with me, this isn't as boring as it sounds). As a birthday present, Bro Dude had made me a tape. For all the younglings out there, tapes were pieces of plastic that you usually had to rewind with a Bic pen as most...oh, hang on, a Bic pen is an orange plastic...ah, fuck it.

Right, so I get on the coach and I've got my Sony Walkman and my 90-minute TDK. Side one is some album by this band Nirvana called "Nevermind" and on the other side is this album called "Mush" by some mob known as Leatherface.

Side one was ready to go and as soon as the opening chords of "Smells Like Teen Spirit" kicked in, I had a revelation. Kind of like the first time you have a dream about a girl where you, you know, do stuff. Or the first time you smoke a cigarette and vomit out the back of your mate's nan's shed. Until this point I'd been listening to pretty much chart music - my mum kept it real with the Neil Young, Steely Dan, Crosby Stills and Nash vibe but this, for the first time, was loud. My music collection extended to East 17's "Walthamstow" and "Monster Hits Vol. 3" and all of a sudden there was this noise. Rough sounding, angry; I was fucking away. In fact, I distinctly remember not hearing the bus sing "happy birthday" as I was so overawed by the music. Ungrateful little fucker.

So "Nevermind" came to a close. "Fuck me", thought I, "that was pretty good shit". Flipped the tape, and in comes Frankie and the boys. "I Want The Moon" is one of the best openers to an album I've ever heard. You get no intro, you get no warning, it doesn't build up, it comes in at whatever volume the Walkman's on and fucking stays there.

Then the vocals start and your sucked in. They're pure gravel, they're clearly owned by a man who drinks 3 litres of Jack Daniels, smokes 60 Bensons and gargles with flaming tyres every day. And then it happened; "How Lonely" smashed into my ears and on first listen, almost made me cry, which was a bit weird seeing as at this point, I had no experience of punk, metal, grunge, whatever - this was just such a fucking palm-shaggingly good song that I didn't really know what to think.

I listened to "Nevermind" and "Mush", flipping the tape over and over as each album finished, all the way to the Isle of Wight, on every excursion on our three-day visit, and then all the way back to London. Then I listened to it every night in my bedroom, and then I listened to it when me and my parents drove to Cornwall from London, and all the way back. And although "Nevermind" to me has been played to death for the last decade-and-a-half, "Mush" still gets played at least once a week.

Leatherface got me into punk. I loved Nirvana's grunge soundings, and "Territorial Pissings" remains one of the all time teenage headbang classics but Leatherface changed my world. I started getting into some of the old school shit (with help from Bro Dude, of course), plus bands like The Jam and The Police, and then started to find my own way with the Southern Californian punks - NoFX, Lagwagon, Mad Caddies, etc. - which got me into some of the Scandanavian hardcore like Satanic Surfers, which made me appreciate a violent vocal and savage drum sound...see where this is going?

I love Bro Dude for fundamentally changing my entire life with a single tape. I love Leatherface for recording, and to this day, performing the greatest punk tunes I've ever heard. I love the fact that Frankie Stubbs today became my friend on Facebook (cue imminent cringe-worthy geek email of adoration...)

You need Leatherface. Trust me on this one.

I'm off for some razorblades and asprin.