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Friday, 19 February 2010

The more things change...

...The more they stay the same. Apologies to those of you were expecting some kind of radically different Metal Harmony after my hiatus last week but did Michelangelo paint the Sistine Chapel overnight? Huh? Did he ballbags. So continue to watch this space. It'll be worth it. Probably.

I had a trawl through the plethora of bands that follow me on Twitter this week in desperate search for some quality relatively unknown metal and found my search as useful as fucking a corpse in the hope of starting a family. There is a real wealth of shit out there. Don't get me wrong; A Day To Remember are a decent pop-metal band, nothing wrong there, but there's no need for 68,000 new bands to sound exactly the fucking same as them. It's indescribably boring. I did stumble across Lead Farmer though and if you like truly garage death grind, check them out

I'm also well into the new album from Valkyrja this week, entitled Contaminated. It's pure black metal and deserves to be played at a granny-bothering volume if only for the insane kick drum. Full review on Metal as Fuck in the next few days so check it out, unless you're either a total pussy or a devout Christian.

Bullet For My Valentine also gave us a taster of new album Fever this week, with a free download of Begging For Mercy. All in all, not bad. Matt Tuck's voice is still a bit weedy and the drumming's hardly something you'd drop your trousers and play with your danglers over but despite me being one of the few that didn't hate Scream Aim Fire, this is a marked improvement.

Remember how I was bitching about not being able to go to Rammstein and having to sell my tickets to Machine Head? Here's the punchline; I won four tickets to the forthcoming Hammerfest 2 festival, which includes the likes of Napalm Death, Devildriver, and many more stalwarts of savagery...but I'm unable to go. Now listen up kids; the primary problem here is money so here's my thinking: you all send me £50 (or equivalent if you're reading this outside the UK) so I can go to numerous events, and I write super lovely reviews for you all to enjoy. Anyone? No? Ungrateful bastards.

Onto shit I shall be attending though, as Download 2010 pulled a real 12-incher out of the bag this week with Rage Against The Machine and Aerosmith (with whom organiser Andy Copping assures us Steven Tyler will perform), as well as other crowd pleasers in the shape of Lamb Of God...which reminds me! The Lamb Of God gig was excellent but I was so nailed I could do about as effective a review as Helen Keller could a 100m-sprint.

Anyway, Lamb Of God, Five Finger Death Punch (not sure why so many people hate this lot) and Stone Sour, which pleases Hot Chick no end. All this being said, in order to ensure not all of my posts are about Download and Sonisphere between now and the summer, future updates on these titanic festivals will be limited to:

Download - 5FDP, Aerosmith, Stone Sour
Sonisphere - no announcement
Download wins

See what I've done there? Informative and opinionated, cunning stunt that I am.

In other news, some mob known as "Irons Maident" or something have virtually completed their new album. Can't think of anyone who cares, to be honest...

Kisses and bum sex,

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